


Warm sunshine, scorching sand

by Kyirah



Series: RoyEd Month 2020 [4]
Category: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Canon-Typical Violence, Chris Mustang (mentioned), Gen, M/M, Mentions of Blood, RoyEd Month 2020, dream-sharing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-04
Updated: 2020-05-04
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:33:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23986861
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kyirah/pseuds/Kyirah
Summary: Day 4 of RoyEd Month: SoulbondA.K.A. dream-sharing soulmates, in which Roy badly needs therapy.
Relationships: Edward Elric/Roy Mustang
Series: RoyEd Month 2020 [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1726450
Comments: 18
Kudos: 174
Collections: RoyEd month





	Warm sunshine, scorching sand

Golden yellow and scorching heat and coarse, coarse sand under his palms, the faint smell of burned meat and scorched stone, the screams of unknown and unseen people faint below his own heartbeat.

Ed knows he's dreaming, how could he not, after years of this?

Ed's dreamed of the desert ever since he was a baby, but the warmth of the sun was replaced to this hellish scorching sand when he was just nine, the welcoming shade of an oasis swiped out of the looming of buildings, the pure blue of the sky slowly invaded by towers of smoke.

He knows what Al thinks of his dreams, heard how his little brother leaned over his fake-sleeping form, and murmured a "give him nice dreams, please". Ed knows, intellectually, that you have some degree of control over what dreams your soulmate will see, that you can pick-and-choose parts of it to show off. Ed knows that, because it's clearer with each passing year, that Ed's been dreaming of the Ishval war ever since he was nine, and that his soulmate intentionally toned down the dreams so that Ed, now 19, still hasn't seen one drop of blood.

Ed pities the poor sod, because Ed has no idea how to control his own dreams, and is sure that whoever is on the other side of that link must get nightmares of all his fuck-ups on a regular basis.

Ed turns his head, tries to tone in the voices, tries to orient himself, because he's fucking tired of this, absolutely done with waking up choking on the smell of smoke. He's asked around, how the soldiers remember the war, to see if he could find any clue for who it was, to no luck.

Hawkeye, after being told why he was asking, carefully tells him she doesn't remember much. The months spent there are narrowed to her rifle, the coarse stone of whatever perch she was in, and the faces of every single person she's sniped.

Armstrong, when sufficiently drunk, cries while talking about making walls for Kimblee to corner his victims against, about the smoke that seemed to be _everywhere_ , about the screams he'll never forget. Ed doesn't ask again.

Every person he asks, the sun scorching down on them and the smoke filling their lungs, well. It seems to be common, it was _war_ , there were tons of stuff that made smoke and the sun was _always_ bearing down on them all.

Mustang, of course, won't talk about it, and Ed isn't crazy enough to ask. That leaves him clueless, and pretty much pissed to all-hell about it.

(If he practices meditation, and secretly goes to those hippie classes about "share positive memories!", well. Al is the only one who knows, and he approves, so really, who cares?)

–

Roy doesn't have any dreams except his own until he reaches the age of 14, when he has vague and blurred dreams that consist of nothing except sounds and color blurs. He doesn't understand, so he asks Aunt Chris, and she sits him down to explain what soulmates are, and what they mean.

He's alarmed, in the beginning, _does that mean I'll marry a_ baby, _aunty?!_ he exclaims, because the only soulmate pair he knows of are Ms. and Mr. Meyer down the street, who babysit him sometimes. Aunt Chris shakes her head, calls in one of her girls, and Maddy tells Roy that she started dreaming when she was 21, and that last year she found her boy, little Luca, who Roy sometimes watched over when Maddy couldn't pay a babysitter. Maddy tells him that a soulmate isn't just someone you marry, but it's simply the most important person in your life.

He's dubious, but Maddy loves Luca and he remembers how she was before finding her baby, so he accepts that maybe he'll find a... best friend, 14 years younger than he is, and that's okay.

Roy is 19 when he attends the classes the army offers in dream-sharing, taking Maes' laughter in stride, but he's dreaming of a beautiful woman in bed, coughing and coughing and coughing, and he wants to provide whatever support he can.

He dreams of a funeral, and thinks hard about the sun's warmth and clear blue skies, and hopes that it's enough.

He goes to war, and dreams laugher and a loving teacher, and he's broken broken _broken_ , but he'll die before he taints his life-line of laughter and a hunger for learning he's rarely seen in anyone besides himself.

Roy is 25 when he dreams of an array he thought forbidden, of blood on the concrete floor and nothuma _nothuman_ and _BRING HIM BACK!._

He's 25 when he sees a little boy on a wheelchair, golden eyes dulled and he _can't_ , he _really, really can't, oh god,_ but he does anyway, fists his hand on that boy's shirt, and shakes him, and it _hurts_. He wants to hug them, to make sure those two will never have to suffer again, but he knows himself, knows his goals, and better yet, he knows his soulmate.

So he screams, shakes, and talks like he'd liked to be talked to. He tells that boy, _his soulmate_ , that the only way forward is to get on his feet and _keep going_ , because God knows Roy can't do it for him, he can barely help himself. His whole body feels elated, when he sees a spark take and _ignite_ when his words hit home, and maybe he's setting himself for a soulmate that will hate him, but Roy doesn't care. As long as he can see that determination, that hunger for knowledge close-up and not just on dreams, he doesn't really care.

Let Edward have as many nightmares as he wants, let him vent to his unknown soulmate, and put his anguish into dreams. Roy will happily wake up to _nothumannothuman_ , will happily keep his dreams as flame-free as he can. Edward needs sleep. Roy can at least give him that.


End file.
